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Nightmare 1I've been told, that writing down thoughts helps out tremendously, that it helps to take the weights off your shoulders. I agree with that, but even though I agree with it, its a scary feeling to have to revisit your deepest thoughts, fears, as well as nightmares. So I'm going to share a re-occuring nightmare that I have.
When this dream occurs, I'm sitting in a dark room, slowly forming into a familiar place, my bedroom in my parents house. I'm lying in my bed, the stand fan humming away, nothing making a sound. There is a jingle of a bell, my cockateal, David, ruffles his feathers. The bell jiggles away and David hisses, like he does when he's angry. I stare at his cage in the darkness, not seeing anything but the inky blackness of the dark room. Silence falls, David quiets down, bell stops jingling. I move my head again so that I'm staring up towards the ceiling and all I hear a
Welcome HomeGrowing up, you were in my life,
Leading me, guiding me, shaping me,
Showing me the path that was right,
Filling my heart with the love that you share,
As I grew, you watched over me,
I drifted away, but you remained the same,
I didn't want any part of you,
Afraid, self-conscience, unwilling,
Years passed and I grew accustomed to the void,
Left in my heart was a growing emptyness,
Filling with things that were terrible,
Knowing that it was wrong,
I drove to your home, nervousness weighing heavy,
I almost turned the car around and left,
Afraid to face what I left behind,
Worried what I might encounter,
The music started and I somehow knew the words,
A warmth filled my heart,
A peace came over me,
The words aimed at me,
As I sat there silently, I asked you to forgive me,
I asked you to come back,
I asked you to love me again,
I said that I have missed you,
Tears fell down my cheeks,
A smile crossed my face,
Soothing words in my heart,
"Welcome home, I've missed you."
Rising SunToday started off as any other day,
Wake up in the morning and pray,
Eat breakfast and get ready for the norm,
Little did I know of the impending storm.
I make my way to the subway,
Pushing past people, to get on my way,
The usual commotion on the train,
The hum of people talking, sounding like endless rain.
Arriving at my office, I sip my strawberry shake,
The busy of the day beginning, then the earth started to quake.
The first thought to go through my mind was "I'm going to die,"
But I knew that I couldn't give up, I had to try.
Pictures fell from where they hung on the wall,
File cabinets rocking back and forth, looking like they'd fall,
Screams from workers filled my ears,
My eyes began to swell with tears.
Three minutes went by, that felt like a lifetime,
The shaking subsided, metal framework starting to whine,
Groaning with the shifted weight on foundation,
I wasn't sure what had become of our nation.
Papers and debris littered the floor,
I had trouble just opening my door,
A Wolf At the Door Chapter OneShe sat in her car, staring out the windshield. Empty; that was all she felt, a deep emptiness that nothing could replace. A tear ran down her cheek as she recalled the words that the detective told her. It's been a month and there's been no tips to help find your son. We have to assume the worst. Her hands gripped the steering wheel, making her knuckles numb.
The moonlight shone down, illuminating the cliff that was in front of her. Darkness lapped at the edge of the cliff, beckoning her, welcoming her into its arms. Her heart ached. It ached for the son that was missing, the son that was her life. In her mind there was nothing left to live for.
Releasing her grip from the steering wheel, she opened the door and stepped out. The warm night breeze stirred, making her skirt gently sway back and forth. The smell of the salt air was sour, yet sweet t
Winter is a time of sleep,
Animals gathering their food in a heap,
Snow on the ground and wind blowing softly,
The long road ahead begins very quietly,
Everything outside is silent,
Only the sound of the owls hoot quiet,
Animals hibernate in their dens,
Resting up to prepare for what Spring will send,
The snow thaws and new life begins to emerge,
The trees and the plant life begin to surge,
The cries of hatchlings in the trees,
The sounds of Spring are soon set free,
Flowers bloom and new leaves begin to form,
Around the new fragrances bees begin to swarm,
Gliding across from flower to flower,
Summer is in the distance creeping up slower,
The sun's heat blares across the sky,
The parched lands sizzle and cry,
Rain is what's needed to quiet these aches,
To close up these cracks and heal the breaks,
Rain falls like a monsoon,
Summer will part here soon,
Cooler weather, taking its place,
We start to see the beginnings of Fall's face,
Leaves change from green to orange t
Heart SongI know your heart is full of sadness,
You think 'how can she put me through this madness,'
Words cannot express what I feel
Only time can start to heal.
Everyday I think back to the 'why,'
And it hurts my heart and makes me cry,
How could I do such a terrible thing,
To the one man who made my heart sing.
Lapse in judgment is no excuse for the things I did,
Of all the hurt I caused by what I hid,
I hope that you can forgive me in time,
For this deed, this terrible crime.
I love you with all my heart,
Nothing will ever tear us apart,
You are my life, my soul, my everything,
Now its my turn to try to make your heart sing.
I'm With You Chapter 1I sat on the side of the road, watching as the taillights faded into the dark. A feeling of confusion swept over me as I sat there wondering why I was left here.
Its okay, I thought to myself, Theyll be back for me.
One hour went by. Then two. Then three. I began to wonder if they were going to come back at all. I began to pace around, slowly starting to panic. What if they werent coming. What if they left me here to fend for myself.
I sighed and stopped pacing. Looking up both ways of the road I decided to head in the directions that I saw them leave in. The gravel on the side of the road hurt my feet as I walked. Weeds brushed my ankles, making them itch. The wind slowly began to pick up, causing me to shiver.
A bridge came into view and I stopped short of it. I felt so alo
Unrequited LoveA man torn by his immortal fate,
Would he ever find his love, his life, his mate,
Going through each day, longing for someone,
Longing for this binding spell to be undone,
A woman sitting on a swing,
From her back spring angels wings,
The wind blows through her hair,
Her skin so pale and so fair,
He sees her through the trees,
Breathless he falls to his knees,
Such breathtaking features,
He didnt know of any such creatures,
She looks up and stares at the wood,
Feeling eyes watching as hard as they could,
Whos there, she asks softly,
But no response, just crickets chirping quietly,
He heard her voice call out,
He wondered what it was about,
Should he go to her and reveal his true nature,
But would she be repulsed at his features,
She jumps off her swing and begins to walk,
Hoping the person would come out and talk,
She gets closer to where hes at,
Walking stealthy like a cat,
He stands still, unable to stir,
Wondering what hed say to her,
He peaks his
A message to the brokenYou drown yourself
in liquid sorrows,
letting the salty mess
burn your wounds,
and the sadness
to drip in your mouth,
consuming your words
and you say
you deserve the pain,
but I want to dry your face,
and whisper in your ear
how the clouds cry too,
while they hold such beauty,
and so do you.
It's Okay to be ImperfectThe moon
Stand Against SuicideI know the pain is perhaps unbearable,
But darling, please put down the blade.
Release your emotions through tears and smiles,
Rather than dreading these days.
Do it for the little girl, whose mother can’t be there,
Or for the boy whose father drank too much.
For the boy who can’t sit in elementary school,
Because the bruises from Daddy hurt to touch.
For the teenage girl lying face down in her bed,
Thinking, why can’t it all be done?
For the elderly man looking up at the stars,
Counting the days one by one.
Do it for the children who wonder, does it end?
For the ones who feel left on their own.
For the ones who think, maybe it wouldn’t be so hard
If I didn’t feel so left alone.
And finally, do it for one other person,
The person in front of these words.
Because you’ll never know how it gets better
When focusing on pain and hurt.
Live one more day, dear, for them and for you,
And I swear to you, problems will fade.
I know, for right now, it’s p
Clear WristA clear wrist, barren of scars,
as opposed to skin sauntered in marks,
tells a trickier story than it's soiled and raw,
uncaring, unkempt counter part.
Bravery, I think it holds,
the strength to bare unimaginable loads
of pain and suffering through endless times,
and withstanding the agony of sleepless nights.
Some think it is fear, the reluctance to cut,
but I believe it opposite, it show courage and guts.
To bear your pain without a nick on your wrist,
is like a solider braving his terrain while being torn limb from limb.
Agonizing as it is, to hide your pain,
you do it so well, and no attention you'll gain.
At the end of the day, it's not cry for attention,
rather a cry for the victory that's silently mentioned.
Your scars are those not self inflicted,
and despite the gnawing intention,
to harm yourself and ease your pain,
the scars you earn are rightfully gained.
In a room of those who have jumped the gun,
and left traces of blood deep in their arms,
do not be tempted to do the sam
dark circlesi haven't slept well in 14 days
my eyes droop pretty colors
'50 shades of purple and grey,
they're bags and they're designer'
making jokes is how i cope
with chapped lips and constant chap-stick
it tastes like honey and mint
i laugh and say i'm addicted.
hooded lids and sleepy smiles
during lunch at subway
my friends ask if I'm okay
I say that I'm just tired.
but really when I see him with her
my heart sinks to the tiles
she's pretty and witty and sure as hell she can sing
and i'm just a loud bone-collector.
when I see her with him,
dancing and laughing and grinning,
the ring on her finger
laughs at my singularity.
for as much as i lie and as much as i try
my loneliness still creeps in,
because no matter how much they protest,
i'm still the lowly fifth-wheel.
walking behind them on sidewalks
that are wide, but built for four
smiles and laughs when they look back
but the frown creeps evermore.
pelvis peaks through paper-thin skin
and knuckles white and pale
my ribs are empty, my bo
I Thought I Needed FeminismI thought I needed feminism, when I was a little girl.
And I am very sad to admit, that this wasn't very long ago.
I thought when he held the door open for me, that he was making a big mistake.
That he was being a pompous ass, and he took my strength for a fake.
And when he offered to pay my tab, I still called him an ass.
Because I thought he assumed I was poor, and below middle class.
Or when his hard work earned him a promotion,
yet I did nothing, and the boss' ignorance to promote me, I believed was a sexist notion.
My friend really wanted feminism when she found her ex-dead drunk,
removed his clothes, and without his consent, had a pleasurable fuck.
When her parents bust into the room unexpected that night,
she said he raped her, and he was arrested without so much as a fight.
Perhaps feminism was there when I walked out into the street in pure nudity,
and shouted the my neighbors “You have no right to judge me!”
I didn't care about the children who were standing in th
Happy BirthdayThinking about things, you come to mind,
I think of who you were and what you've done,
You were a strong man, who loved his family,
You were a provider for those you cherished,
You were a soldier, you defended my rights,
You made your family proud those years,
You still make me proud,
I may have only met you when I was nine,
But it felt like I had known you a lifetime,
You held me in your arms when I would stumble,
You would tell me how much you loved me,
Looking into your eyes all I had was such comfort,
Memories are all we have now,
Memories that make us laugh,
Memories that make us cry,
Memories that make our hearts fill with love,
Memories that make us proud,
I can say I miss the calls I would get,
We shared our birthday together,
I looked forward to that call with anxious waiting,
But now, after 14 years, I still sometimes wait for that call,
It never comes, but no matter, I still sit and wait,
I love you Papa, with all my heart,
The loss of you is still as fresh as the day you le
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